New Music: Apparently, Still Being Made

Liz over at Gingers is the Watchword posted a list of the albums of the year for 2008. Awesome, right? Sadly, I've never even heard of these groups/singers. In fact, it was news to me that new music is still being made.

Well, that is, except for country. Lots of country albums still being cranked out. I guess songs about shootin', dyin', drivin' in circles and blonde girls with big, floppy tits are still popular. To be fair, there's the occasional times when I feel in a "country mood" and will toss in a Garth Brooks CD or get seriously old school with a George album (take your pick, Strait or Jones), but those times are few and far between. Typically, if I'm in need of the equivalent of lyrical suicide notes, I turn to R.E.M.

But, to say that there's new music out there...wow. Blow me over, or whatever it is that Popeye mutters shortly before knocking the shit out of Bluto. See, I wouldn't know that, mostly because I have some of the most corporate of corporate radio shoved down my throat, and even then, it's nothing new. Sad, but true. A few years ago, all of the radio stations down here underwent format changes. The good classic rock station got turned to country and they stole my beloved Bob & Tom and replaced them with John Boy and Billy. Now, you might think Bob & Tom suck, and I wouldn't be able to argue with you very passionately or for very long, but Bob & Tom compared to John Boy and Billy is like comparing the collective works of Shakespeare to the contents and RDA information on the side of a box of generic Lucky Charms. Also, I will add here, the classic rock format that it was prior to being switched was actually filled with good music from a by-gone era, as in Elton John did not tickle the airwaves in between thunderous anthems by AC/DC and Black Sabbath.

This, of course, left a void on the airwaves for good to decent music. Unfortunately, we had two radio stations that decided to fill that void. One was a new rock/alternative station, the other was an adult alternative station. The new rock station suddenly became the classic rock station, except not. Everything's watered down now, and every third song is Metallica followed by Ozzie Osborne (gotta cling to the popularity of the reality television series, I guess) followed by more Metallica, I think. I don't know. I actually heard Space Odyssey on there the other day, and while I haven't anything against David Bowie--except maybe that his dick is much bigger than mine--it isn't the sort of thing I want to rock out to when I'm feeling angry, bitter, or just like turning the volume up. For some unknown reason (oh wait...we do know...they're lying to us!), the radio station dubbed themselves "96 Rock: Everything that Rocks!", when really they should be called "96 Suck: Everything that Sucks!" Probably won't sell as many t-shirts that way.

The adult alternative station turned over to a classic rock format, as well, except this one is like pussy classic rock. Lots and lots of Elton John. And Queen. But, not like the good Queen, no, we can't have any of that. It's Bohemian Rhapsody. All. The. Fucking. Time. If it's not Sir Elton or Freddy Mercury, we throw the door wide open and let in a lot of arena rock. *shudders* There's a constant mixture of Yes, Boston and Styx with a healthy injection of ELO playing all the fucking time! Again, not that I have anything against Elton John, but seriously, I can't take anymore Tiny Motherfucking Dancer, alright.

The remainder of the dial is littered with oldies (tolerable), 80s--and not the good 80s, either, mind--country (argh), religious (no thanks), jazz (passable, at times), and classical (soporific). As you can see, it's pretty much a radio wasteland down here. This is why I'm pretty much forced to listen to talk radio and sports talk radio. Even then, I can only take those in small amounts because the sports talk guys around here are pretty much douchebags. The only good sports talk personality down here is Bomani Jones, and he takes over during the lunch hour, so I don't even get the pleasure of listening to him.

This all brings me back to Liz's post. I pretty much have to rely on the rest of the world filling me in on the music scene because I am pretty limited on my music sources. Oh, sure, I could get back on the Pandora radio thing--and I just might, when Santa delivers unto me the new computer--but that would be pro-active. I would just rather you guys do all the work and then I can read about your thoughts on the music and then I can go out and sample these things. See how this is? It's give/take: You give; I take. Simple as that.

One final thought on the paucity of good radio around here: You'd think that, if you're such a badass that your on-air personality that you've createded for yourself is "Bob the Blade", you'd sound more like said badass and less like a fourth grader with allergies. Just a thought.