Friday Morning Latin Lesson, Vol. LXVIII

Remember back in January when I had a progression of home appliances up and die? The final cog in that bastard machine of failure and depression was my television. As I mentioned in the above-referenced post, we were planning on getting a new television this year, but we were thinking more toward Christmas time.

Well, now it's go time.

This is why I'm taking Friday off this week, as well as yesterday. My wife and I are going to spend the day together and shop for a television. Fortunately, she works tonight, because I'm sure we'll hate each other by the time we're done shopping and spending the time with one another.

I can see all the married people in the crowd nodding.

I can't. I made that up. Fuck, if it's anything like the other recent Latin lessons have been trending, there isn't a one of you out there actually reading this, so it's not like I can actually see you.

I kid, I kid.

Anyway, hopefully, by the time you read this (if you read this at, say, four o'clock or later--because you've been working hard all day and not reading blogs, right?) I'll be firmly ensconced upon my couch, enjoying my new television.

My wife and I have finally decided to jump into the flat-panel television pool with both feet. We're going 42", which means I won't have to squint to see the screen from across the room (we have a long living room). Also, it will make Anime Fridays with the Family a lot more easy to enjoy, what with the big screen and not having to cram everyone into our bed and all.

Jesus, I cannot wait for football season...pfft! Anime Fridays? Bring on yet another year of mediocrity that is Notre Dame football, baby! I can't wait to be completely disappointed in 1080p!

Anyway, if you happen to be around my house this weekend, you'll probably hear me uttering something like this to the kids:

Tace! Tata televisiem spectat.
Pronounced: "Tah-kay! Tah-tah tay-lay-wee-see-aim spake-taht."

Predictable translation in the hovertext.

You might have noticed a bit of "New Latin" there in the translation. They didn't have televisions in Ancient Rome? Wow. Who knew?

Anyway, while I was coming up with this week's phrase for translation, it put me in mind of something funnier that I saw on the internet a couple of months back. So, here's a little bonus Latin to get you ready for the weekend:

Lupa, obsera os tuum cum Billy Mays dicit!
Pronounced: "Loo-pah, ohb-say-rah ohs too-oom coom Billy Mays dee-keet!"

Do I really need to translate?

Strangely enough, I couldn't find a Latin translation for "Billy" (probably because it's a German name...), so I just went with his un-Latinized name.

What, you're still here? Fine. Pull up a slice of couch, but don't talk unless there are commercials on.