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Inspirational Reads

He Slimed Me, Ray

September 12, 2008

Hey all. Sorry for the silence of the past couple of days. Well, I did want to leave my mad props for B-Dubs up for a day or so, that way everyone could let their imaginations run wild about the wild and crazy stupid shit we did in college. And, based on the number of people offering to bang Will on his birthday, I think I'm going to have to let everyone know when my birthday is. Jesus. When did this turn into Will's House o'Gettin' Some?

Anyway, remember a couple of days ago when I referenced the plague going around my house? Well, it all started innocently enough when I came home to find the little boy sleeping in my bed, wheezy breath and snotty nose and everything. The problem with having a little boy like Tank is that he's very affectionate. He likes to give kisses and hugs and wipe his snotty nose all over you. He's also strong like ox, so it's difficult to deny him when he really has his heart set on smearing his germ-ridden bodily fluids all over you hugging you. And, he's a sweet boy, so you don't want to kick him to the curb and tell him "Hell no, sick-o" want to reciprocate. So, there you are with a disease-riddled four-year-old wrapped around your torso. Fabulous.

Unfortunately, all that overexposure to mucus and such has finally dragged me down. Hot, wild monkey sex with the Mrs. while she was sick probably didn't help matters much, either.

So, that's why I've been quiet since Tuesday. Many apologies. I'm going to go curl up under my desk and sleep until 4:00 rolls around. Ta.


Jidai said...

Oh I'm looking forward to having a kid now...

Lisa-tastrophies said...

DUDE!! What is it with men wanting to bang us when we are sicker than a two legged dog on a trampoline? No wonder you got sick. I don't care how many men sponsored studies there are about sex helping you feel better, it DOESN'T do anything for US!! We still feel sick. You might feel better, but we don't. Sorry, but I had to stick up for the Bodacious B.
P.s. hope you feel better soon.

Rider said...

What is it with men wanting to bang us when we are sicker than a two legged dog on a trampoline?

Sometimes the womens attack us when we're sick, even when we say stop. And we're guys so we don't put up much fight.

Plus I feel that much more desirable knowing I get some even when feeling sub-human.

Hap said...

What jidai said.

the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

Dang, Hap, I didn't know Mrs. Hap was pregnant. Congrats, man.

Since I've started this here thing, Mrs. Chemgeek's had a kid, and now Mrs. Hap and Ashley are both pregnant.

A Crown of Thistles: Den of Fecundity