TMI Thursday: And Then She Did the Dishes

As far as TMI Thursdays go, this one is fairly innocuous. If my salient tales about the sex don't sate your need for inappropriate stories, try LiLu's place, which is the home of TMI Thursdays!

A couple of weeks ago, the wife and I had a fight. Not a real big fight, but we were kind of snippy with one another. I don't even remember what it was about; probably just a mixture of cabin fever, the kids driving us nuts and one of us (her) having gas.

Or...maybe it was one of those fights that couples have just so they can get to the make-up sex. See, the Ex- told me that sometimes girls pick fights just so they can get to the make-up sex with their men, that way everything is cathartic and more awesome than normal. And, God knows (as do our neighbors) that the wife and I have had many a night of anger followed by many a night of passionate, loud moaning.

So, anyway, we were at the point where we weren't speaking on a Wednesday night, and then the next night there was some talking. And we went to bed, where my wife rolled over and turned the light off and all that. I was still lying in bed, reading, and when I finished up, I cozied up next to her. Awww, how cute, right?

And then the urge began to hit me.

"Are you asleep?" I asked.

"Yes," she replied, "leave me alone."

So, I slicked down my pants and underwear. I started rubbing myself up against her from behind. She still pretended she was asleep. I kept rubbing myself up against her. Then, to make things even better, I started pulling down her pants and rubbing myself on her bare ass. This is my go-to move, the pressing-my-erect-penis-into-her-ass maneuver. Much like Colt 45, it works every time.

Finally, she's pushing back against me, and I'm matriculating myself down to where I'm coming at her from behind. I can get just a little of me into her, and she's digging it, but I'm frankly not satisfied. You don't bury your treasure with half of it sticking out. So, after I had gotten her good and worked up, and I was raging hard now, I decided it was time to take what I wanted.

I extricated myself and decided that I was going to throw her on her back and give her a jolly rogering. The only problem was, the lights were off, it was dark, and I couldn't exactly see what I was doing.

As I went to grab her shoulder and throw her back onto the bed, she began to sit up and roll over and pull her pants the rest of the way off. So, when my hand went flying to grasp ahold of her...my trajectory was all wrong and my hand punched her right in the eye.

Down she went, the reverberations of the meaty smack of my hand meeting her eye still echoing in the darkness of the bedroom.

And then the giggling commenced. From both parties. I did ask if she was alright, and then we giggled some more.

And then we fucked like hounds.

And, to top it off, we giggled some more.

Sated, we went to sleep.

The following morning, we were in the kitchen getting ready for the day, and she was feeling the tender flesh around the orbit of her eye. It wasn't bruised...badly...but it was a little puffy and a little bit darker than it should be. I felt bad, but not enough that I didn't start giggling again.

Because that's the kind of guy I am: punch 'em in the face, fuck 'em hard, laugh about it in the morning. Yep, I'm a keeper.

And for good measure...while the kids were eating breakfast...she unloaded and reloaded the dishwasher.