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Inspirational Reads

Friday Morning Latin Lesson, Vol. LXVIII

May 7, 2010

Remember back in January when I had a progression of home appliances up and die? The final cog in that bastard machine of failure and depression was my television. As I mentioned in the above-referenced post, we were planning on getting a new television this year, but we were thinking more toward Christmas time.

Well, now it's go time.

This is why I'm taking Friday off this week, as well as yesterday. My wife and I are going to spend the day together and shop for a television. Fortunately, she works tonight, because I'm sure we'll hate each other by the time we're done shopping and spending the time with one another.

I can see all the married people in the crowd nodding.

I can't. I made that up. Fuck, if it's anything like the other recent Latin lessons have been trending, there isn't a one of you out there actually reading this, so it's not like I can actually see you.

I kid, I kid.

Anyway, hopefully, by the time you read this (if you read this at, say, four o'clock or later--because you've been working hard all day and not reading blogs, right?) I'll be firmly ensconced upon my couch, enjoying my new television.

My wife and I have finally decided to jump into the flat-panel television pool with both feet. We're going 42", which means I won't have to squint to see the screen from across the room (we have a long living room). Also, it will make Anime Fridays with the Family a lot more easy to enjoy, what with the big screen and not having to cram everyone into our bed and all.

Jesus, I cannot wait for football season...pfft! Anime Fridays? Bring on yet another year of mediocrity that is Notre Dame football, baby! I can't wait to be completely disappointed in 1080p!

Anyway, if you happen to be around my house this weekend, you'll probably hear me uttering something like this to the kids:

Tace! Tata televisiem spectat.

Pronounced: "Tah-kay! Tah-tah tay-lay-wee-see-aim spake-taht."

Predictable translation in the hovertext.

You might have noticed a bit of "New Latin" there in the translation. They didn't have televisions in Ancient Rome? Wow. Who knew?

Anyway, while I was coming up with this week's phrase for translation, it put me in mind of something funnier that I saw on the internet a couple of months back. So, here's a little bonus Latin to get you ready for the weekend:

Lupa, obsera os tuum cum Billy Mays dicit!

Pronounced: "Loo-pah, ohb-say-rah ohs too-oom coom Billy Mays dee-keet!"

Do I really need to translate?

Strangely enough, I couldn't find a Latin translation for "Billy" (probably because it's a German name...), so I just went with his un-Latinized name.

What, you're still here? Fine. Pull up a slice of couch, but don't talk unless there are commercials on.


Wynn said...

I think my TV got pissed off at me when I shipped the VCR/DVD off because I seldom use it, because now it has started losing channels and colour. I'm terrified that it will break before I move, three weeks without a TV!

Cue Wynn, sitting in a corner rocking back and forth while hysterically giggling and pointing at a bird through the window.

Stay with me TV, stay!

BigSis said...

There were no TVs, but apparently there were whore mouths in Ancient Rome. I'd never thought about that before. So, thanks for making me think this morning :)

Gwen said...

Cue ZuZu Petals in Ford Fairlane:
"Tee Wee!"

Congrats on your new boob tube!

Eric said...

Do they make organic LED yet in 42"? It's been so long since I've thought about buying a television...

Anonymous said...

I am guilty of reading blogs (and being a regular social media whore) at work.

And I am not sorry about it.

Amber Tidd Murphy said...

Happy big tv day!!

Getting the Big Ten Network for next season?

Happy Hour...Somewhere said...

42"? I bought a 46" TV and a year or so later I really wish I had bought one bigger~! You quickly get spoiled by the picture, and if you get a spiffy new Blu-Ray player, you will want one bigger. Or maybe that's just me. Enjoy!

Scope said...

When I got my TV 2 years ago, I was looking at a 42" LCD. At the last minute, I went 46", and I regret it.

Should have gone 52".

Is a 46" TV too big for the bedroom?

But seriously, you will love football on that thing.

Nej said...

The first phrase, when said out loud, sounds strangely Hawaiian.

Just saying. :-)

Congrats on the TV shopping!!! We broke down and did it when we moved. Our long living room didn't get along with our 400 lb, 26 inch tv. (hehehehehe)