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Inspirational Reads

Fluffy Strikes Back

July 21, 2008

You ever hear a story that had you sort of dumbfounded? Like, the story either amazed or confused you so much that you just sort of stared, mouth agape, at the storyteller, resting your chin in your hands, drinking the whole thing in?

If you've read this blog for long, you'll know that I often troll the Indianapolis Star for interesting reads in the news department. For one, I like to keep up on what the dumb broad from Carmel is doing about the Victoria's Secret model controversy at the mall. I also like to scour Indiana for morons in the news so I can contribute just a little bit more to the Karma Police blog.

And then, sometimes, I read a story just for the sheer delight of reading a story. Or, let's say, that the headline features something about a man beating his wife to death for not emptying the litter box.

If you read that story, you might understand why I sat here for a few moments, mouth agape, peeping the details of said sordid affair. Number one, who beats their wife for not emptying the litter box? I mean, do they have a pet cougar, or is Fluffy just rolling out human-sized turds? I get it, some guys are total douches and beat their wives for stupid shit. Clearly, this guy is a douche.

But then, she's 18 years older than he? And, he's a convicted sex offender? And the two of them moved from California to live with another convicted sex offender? Double-u, tea, eff. There's a lot more to this story than what we see right here, and it kind of pains me that I'm not back home to work my "sources" for the truth behind this thing.

Overall, though, just...fucking...wow. What a messed-up house that must have been. If I can find anything else about this, I'll be sure to keep everyone up to date. Not that this is funny or a topic to make light of, but I want to know the fucking truth here. This is messed up and it takes place in what I consider my "home town".

Stay tuned.

12 comments:

The Ex said...

Holy. Why didn't he just scoop it? That would have made more sense.

the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

Exactly! That's why I'm convinced that there is something else at play here.

Jidai said...

Is it a little weird to be worries about the cat in that house?

the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

I think I'd be worried about anything in that house.

Frank said...

Back when I lived in Detroit, there was a section in the paper that listed minor crimes off the police blotter. Most of them dealt with drunk driving or petty theft, but I remember one a few years ago about a 10 year-old boy throwing a bowling pin at an old woman's house, and then the old woman chasing him for nearly half a mile with a garden rake.

Crime is fuckin' hilarious.

Falwless said...

I don't see the problem here.. ?? She wouldn't clean out the fuckin' litter box and he showed her who's boss. Clearly she needed to be taught a good lesson. Bet you money she's picking up after herself in that nursing home...

red said...

Oh, God. Falwless cracks me up.

Shit. That can't be the first comment I leave on your blog. Um...

That guy is a nominee for d-bag of the year for sure.

the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

You'll notice that he beat her, not just for missing the clean up time of Fluffy's nuggets, but also for "not keeping their room clean".

I guess those were two strikes against her.

Chemgeek said...

"And, he's a convicted sex offender? And the two of them moved from California to live with another convicted sex offender?"

There's not enough F's in WTF to explain how F'd up this truly is.

minijonb said...

sounds like Darwin eliminates another victim.

Lisa-tastrophies said...

Holy Crap! How did Jerry Springer miss this one?
I am still stuck on the convicted sex-offender and they moved in with another sex-offender and their from CALIFORNIA!!!

On another note: If you are going to smack your b*tch up for not doing something, might I suggest it be for something a little more redeeming. Not for something that just reenforces the need for the death penalty (cause here in Texas "He just needed killin'" is still a legal defense).

OMG!!

Hap said...

I have a lower threshold for amusement - reading about the sixth DUI (of the week) who is busted on 315 at 2 am for not maintaining their lane and having an expired drivers' license and two ounces of pot and a pipe in the passengers' seat usually amuses me.