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Inspirational Reads

Saint Herbert's Day

October 30, 2008

October 30th is St. Herbert's Day. Who is Saint Herbert? Good question. No one knows.

In lieu of that, we should all celebrate an American Saint's day, or at least his birthday. Today is Henry Winkler's birthday, and unless you're a divothead, you know that Henry Winkler was the Fonz, aka Arthur Fonzarelli from TV's Happy Days. You know, he of the egregious greasy Italian stereotypical "aye!!!", the motorcycle and the jumping of the shark. This has earned him a life-sized bronze statue of himself with the motorbike in Milwaukee. It is sometimes called "The Bronze Fonz". Nice.

Also celebrating birthdays today are Tory Belleci, the funny and HOT dude on the build team from Mythbusters and also the dude who built the pod racer models and federation starships in the Star Wars prequels. And in case you wanted to know, gold-winning gymnast Nastia Liukin turns 19 today. Perverts the internet over rejoice.

However, I would be remiss if I didn't give some honor to St. Herbert, so here's some other famous Herberts from history or that I've met, just to sate your appetite for useless shit:

Herbert Hoover: American President and favorite son of West Branch, Iowa. Notable accomplishments: The Great Depression; mining zinc in Australia; having a dam named for him.
Frank Herbert: Author of Dune, who, along with J.R.R. Tolkien, gave George Lucas the idea for Star Wars.
Herbert Axelrod: Tropical fish enthusiast currently serving a prison sentence for tax fraud.
Herbert C. Brown: Organic chemist who made organoboranes sexy. Got screwed in the named reactions department during that period when it was posh to name reactions after what they did rather than the chemist who sold his soul in order for the reaction to work. Professor at Purdue, but then, everyone makes a mistake.
Herbert G. Wells: Some dude who wrote some stuff about martians and time travel and such. A few people got upset when someone read his work over the radio in a 1938 stunt.
Herbie the Love Bug: One of the few Hollywood actors who can say that Lindsay Lohan has been in him, and not the other way around.
Herb Tarlek: Boorish ad executive for WKRP in Cincinnati. Wearer of bad suits. Friend of Les Nessman.
Herbert: The pedophile from Family Guy.
Herbie Hoover, aka Hoover the Mover: Cantankerous old man who used to run a moving service back home. Once, while single-handedly wrestling a couch into my aunt's living room, he told my cousin to "get the fuck out of the way before I turn you into a grease spot on the rug." This caused me to laugh for about three solid hours.


david wells said...

A photo of Nastia would have been nice.

Also, I bet Herbert Hoover would have looked good in that dress.

Lastly, is there a Laverne & Shirley statue in Milwaukee as well?

LYDIA said...

Nastia is pretty hot!

Candy's daily Dandy said...

Hoover the Moover, a classic! I would not want to piss him off!

Will Shannon said...

Herbert Hoover was also the first U.S. President elected from California, the first Quaker to serve (Nixon was the other) and the architect of the U.S. rationing program during WWI. He was also the president to live the most number of years after his presidency (some thirty-one and a half years).

Also notable was Herbert Spencer, political and social philosopher of the nineteenth century. Wrote the very influential book Social Statics. It was Spencer, and not Charles Darwin, who coined the phrase "survival of the fittest."

Less notable (but still named Herbert) were Herbert Caen (long-time columnist for the San Fransisco Chronicle) and Herbert Stein (economic advisor to Nixon and father of Ben Stein).

Herb, Herb, Herb...we hardly knew ye!

LYDIA said...

Hey thanks for the Nastia pictures - is she modeling her clothing line or something? She has legs for days! I am mucho jealous....

McGone said...

Having just witnessed that Fonz statue in person I will warn people that if you stand there long enough a crazy/potentially homeless women will come up and start telling you allllll about it. It's creepy (and full of dubious information), so back away slowly.

Gwen said...

1. LOVE TORY. Major nerd crush.
2. That Lindsay Lohan joke: HAAHAHAHA!

BeckEye said...

Just one correction to your post:

"...Tory Belleci, the HOT dude on the build team from Mythbusters..."

david wells said...

WOW, I see you updated with photos of Nastia! Thank you!

the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

Yes, see the lengths I'm willing to go for you folks? I also added the HOT description to Tory, just because I love you all so much.