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Inspirational Reads

Totally Blowing Shit Up Tuesdays: Pumpkin Edition

October 6, 2009

Has it turned to fall where you are, too? Okay, sorry, Elliot. For the rest of us, fall is most likely in the air, and we can now feel comfortable with ourselves while we're lying under a blanket or afghan watching college football games all day on Saturday.

Wait? What? I'm the only worthless sonuvabitch who does that? Really? Huh. Maybe my wife has a point. If she's right about that, then my feet probably stink, too!

Anyway, fall down in the southeast is a lot different from fall up in the Great Lakes area. For one, it typically comes later down here than up in my beloved homestate of Indiana. Another is that, down here, we have a lot more trees and fewer withered fields of corn, so I think fall is prettier down here. At least in the mountains. But then, I like mountains...as we've discussed previously.

Fall is easily my second-favorite season. I mean, sure, summer is great for getting out and about, especially with the slutty way girls dress in the south east (I know, they dress skanky everywhere...I just notice it here more). I love the nip in the air, the earlier evenings, the cool nights made for sleeping. It's time for the leaves to change. It's time for the birds to migrate. It's time for squashes, corn and pumpkins.

Did I say pumpkins? No, I typed it. Pumpkins, however, were mentioned. You know what would be awesome? Blowing up a big one.

Fortunately, we live in a world with David Letterman, and he can accommodate us.


Sorry, I don't know what the "stuff" was that Drew stuffed in the pumpkin before it was turned into pumpkin compote. To that end, we'll not have sciency lessons today. I can hear you weeping. No, really, I hear weeping. Oh, that must be me.

Either way, that explosion was pretty nice. Most of the force went into blowing the pumpkin to pieces, since the wet sand would have just absorbed whatever shock went into it, thus helping to hurl chunks of orange gourd all about the beach. Run for your lives, indeed.

Oh, and as a follow up to yesterday...I came home and took the kids outside to play. When we were done out there, I came in, wandered upstairs, and then decided to change out of my clothes. I took my pants off, took my shirt off, and pulled on a pair of pajama pants. Then I decided that, since I was upstairs anyway, I might as well fix the kids' bathroom. I put in the bar, put the float on, turned the water back on and everything worked perfectly.

It took less time to fix that than it did to change my pants and shirt. I celebrated with a brownie. The edible kind, not the ones you find in the toilet. Gross. Corny, but gross.

19 comments:

erin said...

I also love fall. I love layering clothes and going for long walks without sweating your ass off.

Scope said...

I loved the direct shot on the camera. I think televised football should have a camera in front of the net, so that fieldgoals have a chance of hitting it. That would look pretty cool in HD.

And at first, I thought you were going to have one of those pumkin chuckin' guns that we use here in the great Midwest.

The Peach Tart said...

Glad you clarified the brownie thing.

Chemgeek said...

Our Fall has been rainy. Almost 4 inches since October started. It has put a damper on doing things outside, so I've been staying inside watching football. Like last night for example when Packer fans got a chance to feel what Viking fans have felt for the past 16 years.

the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

There was a football game last night?

otherworldlyone said...

This is probably going to cause me great humiliation....

but I wore that pumpkin constume when I was a teenager. That exact one.

Don't ask.

Harmony said...

I too, love fall! Our pumpkins are getting pretty big and now I feel like we should at least blow one of them up. Damn it! What was in there again?

Moooooog35 said...

I once had sex with a really fat girl that felt like blowing up a pumpkin with a bike pump.

Elliott said...

We had three days of 'fall' weather before we hit 90 again. No leaves changing, and I can't buy a pumpkin when it's 85 degrees outside.

Of course, I grew up trick-or-treating in a parka, so there's a happy middle ground somewhere.

And I'll be in Ohio at the end of the month, so I get at least a little taste of autumn.

And I couldn't watch the game last night. It was like a bizarro universe and the 20 seconds I saw made my brain hurt.

JenJen said...

Since I am in the Great Lakes State, I can officially declare it fall. It's chilly; I just pushed the heat up, and my daughter had gloves on the other morning during a football game.

Brownies are my favorite treat.

red said...

It's even chilly here! I've had to wear more than a tank top to bed for the last 2 nights!

Jidai said...

Of course there was a football game last night! Just cause your team didn't win, doesn't mean it never happened.

the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

No, what I saw last night was a ritual sacrifice at the hands of Jared Allen and the Minnesota Defensive Line.

Talk about how great Rogers threw the ball around, if you'd like. If it wasn't for the forced fumble/take away turned into a touchdown AND the luck of having a safety rather than a fumble at the goal line, and that "game" is not even close.

Raine said...

I always loved to smash pumpkins!

Nej said...

So...did the guy in the black leather jacket get pumpkin on his ass? I mean, they put that piece of safety glass there for a reason, and he just kept sticking his booty out past it. :-) :-)

dg said...

A giant semi loaded with tons of pumpkins was clipping along in front of me today, and pumpkins began sliding off the towering stack on the trailer. KABOOM. Smashing pumpkins. Everywhere. Not quite exploding, but impressive, nonetheless. And, thankfully, not fatal.

Candy's daily Dandy said...

Pumpkin guts...

It just don't get any better than that.

Cora said...

Shoot. I usually watch TBSUT with my nephew, but the little scamp isn't here right now. He'll love this one. We'll be back.

Tennyson ee Hemingway said...

It's Spring where I am. People from other countries read this you know. Not just Americans.